It's that weekend where chocolate takes precedence, church is attended to celebrate the death and resurrection of Christ, the Easter bunny is envisioned paying you a visit, and hats are very acceptable and fashionable to wear. Just joining into the Easter celebration here on Storywraps and inviting you along ... you are welcome here to join in the fun.
Unwrapping Easter humour for you... and we thought we had problems :)
Loved this one...
All I Need to Know About Life I Learned from the Easter Bunny
Don't put all of your eggs in one basket.
Walk softly and carry a big carrot.
Everyone needs a friend who is all ears.
There's no such thing as too much candy.
All work and no play can make you a basket case.
A cute little tail attracts a lot of attention.
Everyone is entitled to a bad hare day.
Let happy thoughts multiply like rabbits.
Some body parts should be floppy.
Keep your paws off other people's jellybeans.
The grass is always greener in someone else's basket.
An Easter bonnet can tame even the wildest hare.
To show your true colors you have to come out of your shell.
The best things in life are still sweet and gooey!
With Apologies to Blondes comes this new Easter joke
Three blondes died and are at the pearly gates of heaven. St. Peter tells them that they can enter the gates if they can answer one simple question. St. Peter asks the first blonde, "What is Easter?" The blonde replies, "Oh, that's easy! It's the holiday in November when everyone gets together, eats turkey, and are thankful and stuff..." "Wrong!," replies St. Peter, and proceeds to ask the second blonde the same question, "What is Easter?" The second blonde replies, "Easter is the holiday in December when we put up a nice tree, exchange presents, and drink eggnog." St. Peter looks at the second blonde, shakes his head in disgust, tells her she's wrong, and then peers over his glasses at the third blonde and asks, "What is Easter?" The third blonde smiles confidently and looks St. Peter in the eyes, "I know what Easter is." "Oh?" says St. Peter, incredulously. "Easter is the Christian holiday, that coincides with the Jewish celebration of Passover. Jesus and his disciples were eating at the last supper. Then the Romans took him to be crucified and he was stabbed in the side, made to wear a crown of thorns, and was hung on a cross with nails through his hands. He was buried in a nearby cave which was sealed off by a large boulder." St. Peter smiles broadly with delight. Then the third blonde continues, "Every year the boulder is moved aside so that Jesus can come out...and, if he sees his shadow, there will be six more weeks of winter."
And Now for the Politically correct version of the above joke.
This illustrates one way in which jokes that are derogatory
to a specific group can be revised to be more neutral.
And Now for the Politically correct version of the above joke.
This illustrates one way in which jokes that are derogatory
to a specific group can be revised to be more neutral.
Three fools died and are at the pearly gates of heaven. St. Peter tells them that they can enter the gates if they can answer one simple question. St. Peter asks the first fool, "What is Easter?" He replies, "Oh, that's easy! It's the holiday in November when everyone gets together, eats turkey, and are thankful..." "Wrong!," replies St. Peter, and proceeds to ask the second fool the same question, "What is Easter?" The second one replies, "Easter is the holiday in December when we put up a nice tree,exchange presents, and celebrate the birth of Jesus." St. Peter looks at the second fool, shakes his head in disgust, tells her she's wrong, and then peers over his glasses at the third fool and asks, "What is Easter?" The third fool smiles confidently and looks St. Peter in the eyes, "I know what Easter is." "Oh?" says St. Peter, incredulously. "Easter is the Christian holiday that coincides with the Jewish celebration of Passover. Jesus and his disciples were eating at the last supper and Jesus was later deceived and turned over to the Romans by one of his disciples. "The Romans took him to be crucified and he was stabbed in the side, made to wear a crown of thorns, and was hung on a cross with nails through his hands. He was buried in a nearby cave which was sealed off by a large boulder." St. Peter smiles broadly with delight. Then he continues, "Every year the boulder is moved aside so that Jesus can come out...and, if he sees his shadow, there will be six more weeks of winter."
(This is an old groaner.)
A man was blissfully driving along the highway, when he saw the
Easter Bunny hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid
hitting the Bunny, but unfortunately the rabbit jumped in front of his car
and was hit. The basket of eggs went flying all over the place. Candy, too.
The driver, being a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulled
over to the side of the road, and got out to see what had become of
the Bunny carrying the basket. Much to his dismay, the colorful Bunny was dead.
The driver felt guilty and began to cry.
A woman driving down the same highway saw the man crying on the side
of the road and pulled over. She stepped out of her car and asked the
man what was wrong.
"I feel terrible," he explained, "I accidentally hit the Easter Bunny
and killed it. What should I do?"
The woman told the man not to worry. She knew exactly what to do. She
went to her car trunk, and pulled out a spray can. She walked over to
the limp, dead Bunny, and sprayed the entire contents of the can
onto the little furry animal.
Miraculously the Easter Bunny came to back life, jumped up, picked up
the spilled eggs and candy, waved its paw at the two humans and
hopped on down the road. 50 yards away the Easter Bunny stopped, turned
around, waved and hopped on down the road another 50 yards, turned, waved,
hopped another 50 yards and waved again!!!!
The man was astonished. He said to the woman, "What in heaven's name
is in your spray can?" The woman turned the can around so that the man
could read the label. It said:
"Hair spray. Restores life to dead hair. Adds permanent wave."
Easter Bunny hopping across the middle of the road. He swerved to avoid
hitting the Bunny, but unfortunately the rabbit jumped in front of his car
and was hit. The basket of eggs went flying all over the place. Candy, too.
The driver, being a sensitive man as well as an animal lover, pulled
over to the side of the road, and got out to see what had become of
the Bunny carrying the basket. Much to his dismay, the colorful Bunny was dead.
The driver felt guilty and began to cry.
A woman driving down the same highway saw the man crying on the side
of the road and pulled over. She stepped out of her car and asked the
man what was wrong.
"I feel terrible," he explained, "I accidentally hit the Easter Bunny
and killed it. What should I do?"
The woman told the man not to worry. She knew exactly what to do. She
went to her car trunk, and pulled out a spray can. She walked over to
the limp, dead Bunny, and sprayed the entire contents of the can
onto the little furry animal.
Miraculously the Easter Bunny came to back life, jumped up, picked up
the spilled eggs and candy, waved its paw at the two humans and
hopped on down the road. 50 yards away the Easter Bunny stopped, turned
around, waved and hopped on down the road another 50 yards, turned, waved,
hopped another 50 yards and waved again!!!!
The man was astonished. He said to the woman, "What in heaven's name
is in your spray can?" The woman turned the can around so that the man
could read the label. It said:
"Hair spray. Restores life to dead hair. Adds permanent wave."
Unwrapping some Easter books to check out...
Jan Brett is the author and illustrator of The Easter Egg. Brett is known for her appealing animals and ilustrations on double-page spreads that have borders with additional artwork that helps tell the story. In this case, the story revolves around Hoppi, a little bunny who wants to create the best decorated Easter Egg and win the chance to accompany the Easter Rabbit as he hides Easter eggs on Easter morning. An unexpected turn of events changes Hoppi's perspective and he ends up the winner for a surprising reason.
This classic by Du Bose Heyward is a heartwarming story of virtue rewarded. The book was originally published in 1939. This charming story tells how a rabbit was chosen to be an Easter Bunny despite (in fact, because of) being the mother of 21 bunnies. Teaching her bunnies to take care of themselves makes Cottontail wise, kind, and swift, all important traits for an Easter Bunny. (Houghton Mifflin Harcourt, 2014 for the 75th anniversary edition.
The picture book Rechenka's Eggs was written and illustrated by Patricia Polacco. Kindly old Babushka takes in an injured goose. She names the goose Rechenka and nurses it back to health. Unfortunately, Rechenka ruins all of the beautiful Easter eggs Babushka has so painstakingly painted. Miraculously, Rechenka replaces all the beautiful eggs by laying one intricately colored egg every day for 13 days, so that Babushka has enough to take to the Easter Festival. Rechenka also leaves a wonderful surprise for Babushka. (Penguin Putnam, 1996. ISBN: 9780698113855)
This classic Golden Book was written by Margaret Wise Brown and originally published in 1947. The overall design of the book and Leonard Weisgard's lush and whimsical watercolors add greatly to the story of a lonely bunny, an unhatched egg, and a new friend. This is a charming story for very young children.
Easter - The King James Version with Pictures by Jan Pieńkowski
From the book's gold incised textured blue cover with artwork featuring Jan Pieńkowski's cut-paper black silhouette figures to the interior artwork, Easter is a beautifully designed and illustrated book that the entire family will appreciate. The text of the book is from the accounts of Holy Week and Easter that can be found in the King James version of the Bible in the Gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke and John.
Jan Brett is the author and illustrator of The Easter Egg. Brett is known for her appealing animals and ilustrations on double-page spreads that have borders with additional artwork that helps tell the story. In this case, the story revolves around Hoppi, a little bunny who wants to create the best decorated Easter Egg and win the chance to accompany the Easter Rabbit as he hides Easter eggs on Easter morning. An unexpected turn of events changes Hoppi's perspective and he ends up the winner for a surprising reason.
P. Zonka Lays an Egg
With its wonderful bright and lively illustrations, P. Zonka Lays an Egg will quickly engage children's attention and the tale of the remarkable hen and her amazing accomplishment will keep them interested. P. Zonka is not like the other hens. While they are laying eggs, she is contemplating all of nature's beauty.
The other hens think P. Zonka is lazy because she hasn't laid any eggs. When she finally lays an egg, it is as creative and unusual as P. Zonka herself. Author and Illustrator Julie Paschkis' inspiration for the exuberantly decorated egg came from the traditional Ukrainian Pysanky, which the publisher describes as "eggs, richly decorated to honor the sun and welcome the spring."
This classic by Du Bose Heyward is a heartwarming story of virtue rewarded. The book was originally published in 1939. This charming story tells how a rabbit was chosen to be an Easter Bunny despite (in fact, because of) being the mother of 21 bunnies. Teaching her bunnies to take care of themselves makes Cottontail wise, kind, and swift, all important traits for an Easter Bunny. (Houghton Mifflin Harcourt, 2014 for the 75th anniversary edition.
The picture book Rechenka's Eggs was written and illustrated by Patricia Polacco. Kindly old Babushka takes in an injured goose. She names the goose Rechenka and nurses it back to health. Unfortunately, Rechenka ruins all of the beautiful Easter eggs Babushka has so painstakingly painted. Miraculously, Rechenka replaces all the beautiful eggs by laying one intricately colored egg every day for 13 days, so that Babushka has enough to take to the Easter Festival. Rechenka also leaves a wonderful surprise for Babushka. (Penguin Putnam, 1996. ISBN: 9780698113855)
This classic Golden Book was written by Margaret Wise Brown and originally published in 1947. The overall design of the book and Leonard Weisgard's lush and whimsical watercolors add greatly to the story of a lonely bunny, an unhatched egg, and a new friend. This is a charming story for very young children.
Queen of Easter
Ann Estelle is at it again. The little girl wants a fancy Easter hat so she can be "Queen of Easter" in the neighborhood Easter parade. She is very disappointed when her mother buys her a plain hat. When Ann Estelle leaves her new hat on the porch, a robin buids a nest in it and lays eggs. What's Ann Estelle to do? There's lots of fun in this picture book written and illustrated by Mary Engelbreit. Her colorful borders and crisp illustrations are a joy. At the back of the book is a nice surprise: an Ann Estelle paper doll, complete with an Easter dress and hat.
Read on and read always!
It's a wrap.
Contact me at: storywrapsblog@gmail.com
No comments:
Post a Comment